Open Question For Lesbians

Hi Lesbians,

This is the Lone Crusader with a quick question for you ladies and it goes like this:

At some point in your life you decided you like chicks not guys, right?

So the simple question that’s been bothering me today is:

IF YOU LIKE CHICKS SO MUCH WHY DO SO MANY OF YOU MAKE YOURSELVES LOOK LIKE GUYS!??!?

Does this shit make any sense?

Before I let you answer let me propose an answer of my own and you tell me if I’m right.

Deep down you really do like men. You need that butch strong personality in your life.

But at some point in your life some guy or guys really fucked you over bad. You wanted to get even so you went homo.

But you’ve still got that desire for balls hidden deep inside so you have your girlfriend dress like a dude or you dress like a dude to try to compensate.

Did I get it right?

I mean I think my logic here is straightforward. Imagine for a moment if I asked my wife to put on a fake mustache, flannel, and baggy jeans on and fuck me in the ass with a plastic penis. I think in that case we could all agree that I have a closet desire to be fucked by a guy. But when lesbians go and do the exact same fucking thing nobody asks them if they have a closet desire to be fucked by a guy too? We just take this shit for granted.

Well fuck that! Not me! The loons haven’t got to me yet and if anything I think I’ll get to them first.

The Lone Crusader

P.S. I realize with this post there’s a good chance I’m probably alienating my #1 lesbian fan, the always funny and always articulate hostess

Well I do feel bad about pissing off one of the only fans I have left after I scared away the atheists, the Christians, the Catholics, the Obama supporters and now the Muslims. But all I can say is you can’t have it both ways. If you want to be “normal” then you just have to suck it up and fuck guys like most normal chicks do. If you want to be “different” and “unique” then you have to be prepared for the regular folks to call you on the carpet for what you do. After they do that and you can call them on the carpet for the shit they do and all this talk about calling on the carpet sounds like a good way for any lesbian to spend her Wednesday afternoon. But I digress.

P.P.S.

Newsflash to lesbians: Just because one or even many guys fucked you over does not mean all guys are bad. Only most.

But if you cut out this manly bullshit and put on some make-up I bet you could land yourself one of the few good ones if you only give it a shot.

P.P.P.S. New thought straight from my hyper-active brain: This makes less sense to me now then it ever did! Fuck! If you lesbians are being lesbians as some kind of protest against men then why the fuck would you want to dress or act like a guy?! Trust me, you’re not making any guys jelous that they can’t have you when you’re sporting that mushroom cut.

If you really want to make our stomach’s churn you’ve got to turn on the sex charm and bleach your hair blonde and get breast implants and basically make yourseleves look like Jenny fucking McCarthy and THEN tell all the guys who are interested to eat shit because you fuck girls only. Now that’s revenge! Not this manly bullshit.

What the fuck are you ladies thinking?

If I don’t get some good answers I guess it’s time to expand the Looney Bin again.