Enjoy it. Live it.
Is this guy full of shit or what?
That’s your weekend fun with TLC.
Now go do something productive or there is no purpose for you being on this planet. And Jesus will come and fuck you in the ass for wasting the precious life he gave you you peice of shit.
The Lone Crusader
He’s the one on the left there.
You heard it here first folks. Now whenever anyone tells you that the Lone Crusader is not on the cutting edge of things you can just kindly proceed to stab them in the eye with whatever sharp object you have handy because I broke this story before any of those any of those assfucking media moguls.
And notice how I break the story. I’m doing the job that the media can’t seem to be able to do.
They can’t just give you the damn story. They can’t just show you the damn picture, tell you that it’s going around the internet and let YOU decide what you think of it.
They have to make up your mind for you about what you should think about it in their gigantic bullshit headlines before you even see the damn thing.
Well fuck you media moguls! The Lone Crusader is taking over your job because you suck at it!
Here’s the picture and if you don’t like it you can shove it up your ass. But I’m doing my part to spread this shit around the internet because I think people should have a right to see it and make up their own minds about it.
Only the facts here. Facts are that this is an African garb, but the types of Africans who wear this garb are generally Muslim. If you don’t give a shit neither do I.
Another fact is that Louis Farakhan who is just about the most evil fucker we still have today is quite taken with this Obama feller and Obama’s Trinity Church is pretty taken with Farakhan. If you’re cool with that so am I. I just report the facts. At least that’s my policy today.
‘Nuff said.
The Lone Crusader
An Open Letter to Muslim Terrorists
Dear Muslim Terrorists,
This is the Lone Crusader. And I’m here to tell you that I see you out there doing your thing. I see you blowing yourselves up along with the infidels in various hotspots around the globe. I also see a lot people giving you a lot of shit for this shit that you’re doing. So right off the bat let me tell you that I’m not like them. I’m different. Unlike everyone else out there giving you a rough time about your terrorism I won’t. I get you. Okay?
No shit. I understand where you are coming from.
I know damn well it says in your Holy Books that you get 70 virgins in heaven when you do this shit.
I understand that from your location and socio-economic status 70 virgins sounds like a hell of a good deal.
So don’t get me wrong. If the Lone Crusader was the Muslim Lone Crusader and in your position I just might go and do the same thing you do.
The simple facts are that nothing could be worse than a life of fucking only ugly women. That can hardly be called a ‘life” at all.
So not having a lot of cash and resources, being doomed to a “life” of fucking either ugly women” or “camels” or the dessert sand is enough to make you want to kill yourself right there.
But then you go and tell me that if I kill myself (which I wanted to do anyway) and kill some Jews at the same time (which I wanted to do anyway because the Koran says I should hate those bastards in Suras 2:61, 65 3:112, 7:166) then I get 70 virgins in heaven! Shit! Now that just sounds like a win-win situation for the Muslim Lone Crusader.
Now do you understand that I’m not here to criticize? Now do you understand that I sympathize with your plight. I mean, you guys and me. We’re like two peas in a pod.
I would kill for sex any day of the week and so would you. People like us are the few who understand that while killing innocent people is not very good…but a life without good sex is just fucking G-d awful. Really we should grab a beer sometime because we both so fucking alike. With all the crazy bullshit that goes on in this fucked up world we are the only fuckers that haven’t lost site of what really matters: fucking. But not just fucking. Good fucking. And fucking nice virgnis with big tities.
So while I’m not here to call you murderers or any of that shit I do have a reason for writing this letter.
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I think there is a better way.
This whole “70 virgins in heaven for blowing up yourself and other fuckers you hate anyway” all sounds fine and dandy on paper. But in reality there are 5 problems here that we must confront before we make a big decision like whether or not to blow ourselves into oblivion for this shit.
Problem #1: The blowing yourself up part.
I think we both can agree that blowing yourself up is a pretty fucked up thing to do. No matter how low your self esteem might be I think we’d all agree you deserve a bit more respect than having your body parts wind up in bite sized pieces splattered all over some Kosher Pizza Shop.
(does this fucker to the left look like he’s having a good time up there?)
Just think about where your nose will end up, or your dick (in some Jew’s soggy french fries perhaps?) or your finger. Just think about it and ask yourself if maybe there isn’t a better way to achieve your goals through other means.
Problem #2: What if they were bullshitting you?
I know you won’t like this one because you are a “believer ’till the end” and all of that bullshit but the beginning of education is facing harsh realities. So let’s face the facts.
There are a hell of a lot of religions out there. There’s three big ones: Judaism, Christianity and Islam. Then we’ve got the different types of Jews Muslims and Christians. Then we’ve got the budhists, hindus and we’ve got no end to the other kinds of looney cults we’ve got out there. But then, there’s only one Truth, now isn’t there? Everybody can’t be right.
Now I’m no mathematician but by my count all things being equal right off the bat you’ve only got less than a 33.3% chance that the shit your religion is even true between the big three religions. Add in all the other religions and let’s throw the the atheists into the mix to make it interesting and that percentage goes down significantly. I mean what if one of those fucked up cults in Texas has the Truth? It’s unlikely, but we just can’t rule out the possibility in a world of logic.
Judaism is probably the oldest of all those religions and those few fuckers are still around doing their thing even though everyone was always trying to kill them so we’ve got to give them a few extra points for surviving against the odds for so long.
So let’s be conservative here and just say that there’s definitely no more than a 20% chance that your religion is even true.
In laymans terms this means that: THERE’S AN 80% CHANCE THAT YOUR RELIGIONS IS DEAD FUCKING WRONG!!!!!!
Do you realize what this means?
It doesn’t mean you should stop being a Muslim. That would be nuts. Maybe G-d digs your shit against all odds. In every good movie the underdog wins. Why should life (the big movie) be any different?
So we don’t want to give up Islam because of this shit. But if we are reasonable folks (and I think we all are) then we won’t hedge any serious bets on a team that has a 20% odds to win.
I mean would you have bet the farm that the Giants would beat the Pats this year? Hell no. I rest my case.
And this is no small bet here.
According to most of those religions out there what you’re planning on doing would earn you a one way ticket to hell.
I mean, just imagine for a moment how much it would suck if after splattering yourself to bits all over a strip mall you go ‘upstairs’ only to see no virgins but just a massive strip mall like the one you were in here on earth. And then all of the sudden you hear this massive explosion. Another explosion and another one. Fuck! That shit is blowing out my ear drums! It’s getting closer and closer until the explosions pelts you with nails and blow you to bits and splatter you all over the wall. You wake up and it happens again. And again and again.
I know I have a fucked up imagination. But would it be so nuts to think that maybe G-d would make you live an eternity experiencing what you made those infidels experience?
That sounds like rough justice to me. It sounds almost Biblical.
I”m not saying you’re religion is wrong at all. I’m just saying you’ve got to a be a pragmatist and weigh all the possibilities, the pros and cons and risk aversion in light of the worst case scenario that before you get hyped up and make some brash decisions that you might not be able to take back.
I mean, I know it sounds crazy, but what if the Islamic books just made up this whole virign thing to sucker people like you into spreading their bullshit religion by the sword because people we”t buying into it on logic alone. I’m not saying it’s true. I’m just saying it’s possible. Consider the possibility and weight them before you make decisions you can’t take back.
Problem #3:
You”ll be in heaven but your dick will be in a hundred peices on earth.
This one you should already be familiar with. I know some of you guys even go so far as to wrap your dick in a napkin before you blow yourselves up. Well I got news for you. WHEN YOUR HIGH POWERED EXPLOSIVE STRAPPED TO YOUR CHEST GOES OFF YOUR napkin won’t do shit.
Your dick will be completely fucked when you are through with this mess so even if Islam is right, how will you take advantage of those hot virgins?
Now I know that they probably tell you that G-d will give you a new Muslim body along with a Muslim super dick, but then ask yourself this question: If they give you a new body and a new super dick, then it’s not really you up there now is it? I mean you were supposed to be the one getting the virgins, not some Superhero angel body dude that looks kinda like you.
Which brings me to another point: Is the sex up there going to be all spiritual and heavenly too?
You don’t want that shit.
You want the down and dirty sweaty sex that you can only get in this world. Not that spiritual shit.
Problem #4:
Virigins are overrated.
Need I say more?
Why fuck a chick that leaves you with a bloody mess all over your dick when you’re done when you can fuck one that leaves you clean as a whistle? Why? Because virgins are tight? Well Chinese chicks are tight too virgin or not (and they can cook a mean stir-fry to boot!).
Plus the chick is in pain the whole time you’re trying to get your kicks. Any man who’s done a nickle’s worth of fucking knows that the real fun begins after you’ve gotten past this bloody virginity bullshit.
If you don’t know you’ll just have to take my word on this: Virgins are overrated. Get yourself some experienced pussy and reap the ample benefits.
Problem #5:
Even if your religion is right, and somehow you have your own dick up there and these virgins are not as overrated as the ones here on earth…you’ve still got another problem.
Do you like blind dates? I don’t either.
No chance to see what you’re getting yourself into. I know your imams tell you that the virgins up there are “beatiful” but you must understand that they are basing themselves on texts written centuries ago. Their definition of “beautiful” back then might be different in a few significant ways to what we consider beautiful now.
It wasn’t that long ago that we considered fat chicks beautiful and skinny ones were the ugly bitches. Fat was a sign of wealth. I assume everyone is wealthy up there with all the grapes and shit you got going on…whose to say you aren’t going to blow yourself to bits only to find yourself with a bunch of Arabian Muslim fatties. I”m not saying its’ going to happen…all I’m saying is it’s risky unless you can get some kind of picture in advance of what these virgins will look like.
And lesson #1 in life: Don’t bet your whole life on shitty odds. Okay? With all these problems I just brought up you are better off playing Russian Roulette than getting involved in this 70 virgin terrorism bullshit.
But don’t worry folks…get ready for the Lone Crusaders unique, never-thought-of-before-because-most-peoples’-skull-is-full-of-shit solution to all these problems.
Get ready for my:
Simple And (Undoubtedly) Brilliant Solution
This one is so simple and brilliant you might just blow up reading it because it’s that good.
I laid out 5 pretty substantial ‘wrinkles’ in your little plan to get your hands on all those virgins, but I can solve all of them for you with one word.
And that word is: www.adultfriendfinder.com
By its own testimony this website is: “The World’s Largest Sex & Swinger Personals Community”.
And there are LOTS of other websites like it. Just google it if you don’t believe me.
I’ve never used this service myself, I’ve never had the need. But I hear from reliable sources that most of these websites are the real deal.
Do you realize what this means my Muslim terrorist friends?
There are actually hot chicks (maybe even some virgins) ready here and now for your Muslim cock. Lot’s of them. They’re not in heaven. They’re here in New Jersey, in New Mexico, in Nebraska in Los Angeles. They’re not asking for money. They’re just asking for a good fuck from a strong warrior like yourself.
You don’t need to blow yourself up to get them. How did this happen?
Well it’s not important right now but there’s been a feminization of the American and European white male that’s been going on for a few decades.
Most of their balls have jumped bail. So you’re left with all these chicks that are DESPARATE for a strong man like yourself to fuck them like they need to be fucked.
They want it hard. And they would love nothing more than Muslim cock to fulfill their desires.
So fuck this heaven bullshit. Why wait with shitty odds? Go with the sure bet that’s available today. These chicks are here. They are now. They are real. You can see their pictures in advance. There are more than 70 of them. There’s probably at least 700 of them on any one of these sites on any given night if you are willing to travel a bit.
Hop on a plane wherever your are, spend two bucks in an internet cafe, pick your slut and start living your fantasy right now.
This is not an ad for these websites. This the Lone Crusader looking out for you and telling you you don’t need to look anywhere but planet Earth for your dreams to be fulfilled.
Paradise is right under your nose. So drop the explosives belt and pick up a mouse and just click your way to your dreams. This really changes the score. Sex is at your fingertips today. Blow yourself and your dick up and there’s a good chance you are PASSING UP the opportunity of a lifetime staring you in the face right now for the 20% chance of heavenly overrated fat virgins. Don’t be a loon. Cut the terrorism bullshit and get down to the original purpose behind all this shit: fucking hot women.
Okay?
Okay everyone.
I’m expecting a lot more fucking and a lot less fighting once this spreads virally through the internet. I can already hear world peace descending upon us heralded by the almighty sound of some chick’s multiple orgasms.
There I did it.
Now go back to whatever the fuck you were doing.
The Lone Crusader
Now that we’ve dealt with the atheists, the homos, the Israel-haters and the Christians…you Catholics might be thinking you’re going to get a free ride.
Fuck that! No free rides over here. No child will be left behind and nobody is safe from the righteous anger of the Lone Crusader!
Here’s my beef with you Catholics. Brace yourself.
It’s Ash Wednesday today and I see you folks walking around town with ash on your forehead in accordance with the ancient tradition to mourn for 40 days before Easter or some shit like that.
This is all good and fine. I mean, why should I interfere with a time-honored and harmless tradition in a country in which the free exercise of religion is each citizen’s birthright?
I just have a few innocent questions for you Catholics that I’ve been wondering about today:
IS THERE SOME RULE WHICH SAYS THAT YOUR ASH MUST ALWAYS BE A SMUDGY OLD MESS! WHO IS APPLYING THIS ASH? DID THEY GO TO SCHOOL FOR THIS SHIT!?!?? IF SO , HOW COULD IT BE THAT THEY ALL FAILED THEIR ASH ART APPLICATION CLASS… BECAUSE WHAT ELSE COULD EXPLAIN WHY THE FUCK EVERYONE WALKING AROUND LOOKS LIKE THEY GOT THEIR HEAD STUCK IN A CHIMNEY!!!!?!!?!!?!!!
I mean I’ve seen TONS of people today with this shit on their head and not one of them had ash that wasn’t a complete smudgy dripping mess!
Jesus Christ!
Most days lots of women spend HOURS doing their make up. But when it come to this shit even spending one moment in the mirror is apparently one moment too long. Religion makes people do crazy shit sometimes.
I know you are mourning and shit, but have you no self-respect? You’re in public now.
Take a tip from the Hindus. They have that little red dot on their forehead. It’s nice, neat and clean and everyone seems to like it.
Couldn’t you also ask that your ash be fashioned in a neat circle, or maybe a square, or maybe you could get a real professional who could fashion the logo of your favorite football team on your noggin.
I dunno. I’m open to hearing suggestions but anything has got to be better than this smudgy mess!
Oh yeah, I have one more question for you fuckers.
DID JESUS WEAR THIS SHIT ON HIS HEAD TOO?
I have no hard facts on this but I find it very unlikely that anybody could’ve kicked off one the most popular religions ever walking around looking like somebody just stuck his head in a barbeque.
I don’t care if the preist is the one who fucked it up. You go into the nearest bathroom get some moist kleenex and you fix that shit up. Okay?
You guys look so gothic. Isn’t that like the opposite of Catholicism? I think you’re supposed to put that shit on your hair…not on your forehead. I dunno. Something got fucked up with this tradition because it just don’t look right.
How could you worship a god who wants you to look like that?
I mean how you could ever get laid looking like that, is really my question.
I suppose you could fuck each other because you have so much in common but the whole thought of you guys fucking with that shit on your head makes my tuna sandwich wanna go out the wrong hole.
I just thought of another question: would you still be wearing that shit on your head if you had a really important job interview to go to? If not, why not? Is your religion something that you only do unless it interferes with really important shit? I dunno. The whole thing just turns me off.
So here’s the deal.
When I’m in charge, if I see anyone with a smudgy mess on their head that will qualify you for automatic and mandatory entry into my highly coveted Looney Bin (still deciding if it should be capitalized….yes…I think it should be capitalized because it’s so important). Okay.
Do we have this straight you Catholic fuckers?
Good.
Now go back to whatever the fuck you were doing.
The Lone Crusader
P.S. Afterthought: Maybe someone who is Catholic and not in the mood of being a hatefilled little prick could respond and tell me how you expect us to act when we are talking to you and you have that shit on your head. Do you want us to just pretend like we don’t notice it? Or would that somehow defeat the purpose of this self imposed suffering. If you actually want the suffering does that mean we should like bang on the table and make a big announcement to the class and be like: “hey cindy got a smudgy shitty mess on her forehead everybody…take a look at this shit, you won’t believe it if you don’t see it!”. That would cause tremendous emotional suffering to you and maybe that would help with the whole mourning and sadness thing.
Just let me know what you want me to do because I’m pretty flexible right now. I might not be later so strike while the ashes…I mean the iron… is still hot.
P.P.S. I noticed a few of you fuckers had just a very small smudge of ash. This makes me wonder. Are you guys just like…’sort of Catholic’….is this sort of like the crazy “reform” Jews we have in Judaism who want to do the shit, but only half-way.
Or maybe the priest was just getting low on ash and he needed it to last so he skimped on you and I’m giving you a rough time for nothing.
Well if it’s the former I say “fuck you”! If you’re going to do this shit, do it right.
If it’s the latter I think you should make a donation to your church so there’s enough ash for everybody next time. Either that or join a smaller more caring church where they are not so fucking cheap about the ash they are willing to dispense, Okay?
P.P.P.S. Where do they buy all that ash anyway? Maybe they just have a big bon-fire and burn Talmuds and shit so they don’t need to buy it. Who knows?
If any miracle bloggers know the answer to that question feel free to comment.
And of course I welcome all the hate filled bullshit comments you can conjure up. I love getting insulted by loons. It reminds me that I’m still on the right track. 
Thanks.
Along with the usual bullshit hate comments I’ve gotten from looney miracle bloggers I’ve also got a few of these Christian folks who keep telling me that they are going to be praying for me because apparently I’m so fucked up.
Well I don’t have to tell you how warm and fuzzy this makes me feel. I mean the thought that grown men and women with jobs and lots of things to do in their day are taking out time to kneel in some church or whatever and pray for little ole’ me just does more for me than even the greatest orgasm could do.
I just have one question for my own personal little prayer team over here: WHY THE FUCK DO YOU ALWAYS NEED TO TELL THE PERSON YOU ARE PRAYING FOR, THAT YOU ARE PRAYING FOR THEM!!!!
Can’t you just go about your business and pray for me goddammit?! Why do you need to announce to me and the rest of my miracle bloggers that you will be doing this shit. Does it make you feel powerful? Like you have the power to “heal” fuckers like me and you want everyone to know so. Fuck that! If you were truly altruistic you’d just do it instead of announcing it to everyone as if it makes you feel superior to me in some way (which of course you are not).
My second question is: how are these prayers going? Have they worked o n people in the past? Have you prayed for sick people and they got well? I mean if this stuff actually works you could make a lot of money. Maybe you and me should go into business together praying for fuckers around the world and healing them for I dunno…$2,000 sounds reasonable if we can stop their heart disease or something like that. We could also offer prayers that cure your hang-nail and could charge like $25 bucks for that.
That could be our volume based business. Are you guys interested in this sort of arrangement? I”ll handle the business end of things and you just do your prayer thing and we can split the profits down the middle. If so let me know and we can put this shit in writing because I think it could be really big. We can go on Oprah together.
What do you think about this deal you Christian fuckers?
I mean, how are your prayers working on me? Have I changed in any way because of it? If so, how? If not, why not?
I want answers. I want them now. Maybe you prayed for me and G-d was just like: “the Lone Crusader? Oh I love that guy, just leave him alone” or maybe G-d was like: “the Lone Crusader? That fucker is so fucked up…even I can’t help him at this point”.
Oh yeah, one last question for my prayer team: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE! I’M THE ONE SPREADING THE KNOWLEDGE OF G-D OVER HERE AND BASHING HOMOS, SHOULDN’T YOU BE PRAISING ME AND PRAYING FOR THE MORONIC ATHEISTS AND THE MURDEROUS HOMOSEXUALS WHOM YOU DESPISE!
I mean if you only have a limited time for prayer shouldn’t you be spending it on the truly fucked up people? You know, the ones G-d says in the Bible we should be putting to death. Those are the real abominations over here who are fucking up the world and here I am trying to point it out to people and you’re praying for ME! Me and not the atheists and the homos?!?!!?!? Have you lost your minds!??!?!
If there were any normalcy in this world I should be like your next Jesus. Everyone should be worshiping the Lone Crusader…maybe I’m like the second coming you are all waiting for.
I think I could make a pretty good case for me being the next Jesus, actually.
First of all I’m Jewish like he was. Second of all, I love G-d A LOT and G-d seems to love me.
Third of all, who since Jesus ever stood up to these anti-religious fuckers like I do? Don’t we all share a common enemy here and shit like that?
Fifth of all I’m the Lone CRUSADER. Need I say more?
The only strike I have against me is that I curse like a sailor. No wait. My cursing makes sailors look like Mother Teresa. But so fucking what!? As long as I’m using these words as swords to strike at the neck of the atheists, the homosexuals and the Israel haters and the loons, that should be a good thing, right?
Oh and one more thing: You think G-d doesn’t know about the words “fuck” “bitch” and “cock”? You think He doesn’t know about the sexual fantasies you’ve been having? You think He doesn’t know what goes on in his own fucking world?????
Well I got news for you fuckers. He knows. He knows everything. Not only does He know those words and your fantasies, he fucking invented that shit. Without Him none of it could exist because he created the whole fucking world from scratch including your brain and all the fucked up shit you can think of. Okay?
So stop trying to be holier than G-d and try to look at the big picture here. I’m doing righteous work here even if it’s coming in a fucked up looking package. Look a bit deeper and you’ll see.
I don’t want to have to put ALL Christians in the Looney Bin but if this continues we just may need to rent more space to fit you and all your crosses in there.
We will find the space. Don’t you worry about that. G-d has me covered on this one. There will be room for all the loons.
If we just build it…they will come. May it be soon.
The Lone Crusader
If any of you didn’t believe in G-d before yesterday, this story should remove all doubt.
First of all, let’s start with the fact that, brilliant though I may be, I don’t know shit about blogging. I like the idea of being able to say whatever the fuck I want without Bolshevik censorship and I have all this fucking pent up shit to let out of my system which is like eating me up inside so I decided to give it a shot.
I wrote my first two posts yesterday (1/30/08). My first post was classily titled, “Atheists are Morons” and proved in a way that only the Lone Crusader can do, that well….atheists are fucking morons.
But my best proof that there really is a G-d came as a result of that post.
Me, knowing less than shit about how to get people to read my blog, I just wrote what I wrote and figured I’d see what happened. But of course I’ve heard that there are millions of blogs out there will only one reader (the author).
I figured mine would be the same story until I would need to buy some book or course or some shit which would educate my ignorant ass about how to get traffic to my blog.
But then a miracle happened.
Within what seemed to me like fucking MINUTES there was a response to my post “Athiests are Morons”. I was shocked.
Don’t ask me how this happened, but somehow some fucker with an atheist blog found my post. Maybe it was because I put atheism in the meta tags and this dude has some kind of RSS detector or some shit which tells him whenever some fucker is blogging about atheism. Maybe he’s really paranoid about people blogging about atheism when he’s not involved.
I don’t know. You’d have to ask him and he’s free to comment here and share with me how he found my post so godamn fast. But the fact is that he did.
And not only did he find it. This get’s better. A compound miracle! If you go to this fucker’s (no offense intended by the way it’s just my colloquilism) blog right now you’ll see a blog that looks like the whole godamn thing is dedicated to arguing with my Post!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Holy shit!!!!!!!!!!
This guy is probably some kind of professional blogger, with tons of his own moronic atheist followers and here he is giving mad publicity to my newborn baby blog!!!!!!
Fuck! I love this crazy world!
Next thing you know what do you think happens?
I start getting MORE comments on my blog.
Unfortunately it was all from other atheist fuckers because they were probably coming from this original atheist fuckers blog, but still it was comments.
I hear that for every comment you get there like 25 people who read but didn’t comment or some shit like that.
So I had like, I don’t know, 4 comments, or something like that. Which means, that (let me get out the Microsoft (R) Word “virtual calculator” and do this shit)….waiting…oh probably like 180 fucking people who visited my blog and read my incredibly brilliant shit and this all happened with in like an hour of me posting my blog.
So whoever says miracles don’t happen. I say “fuck you!” and I say we throw you in the looney bin because miracles do happen, even if they happen in the form of long-haired hippies calling your arguments “retarded”.
If any other fuckers happen to find this blog by some other miracle you can verify that what I’m saying is the godamn truth by going to the long haired hippie’s blog which is: http://scaryreasoner.wordpress.com/ and see that I’m not shitting you. You’ll see his attack on my arguments and a little debate that broke out between us in the comments section which eventually turned all soft and mushy and I was like “I’m not gay dude”, and he was like “but you said…”…oh whatever…you can see it for yourself.
Thank you G-d! You’re the best. No I’m the best. No we’re both the best. Let’s call the whole thing off.
The Lone Crusader
P.S New thought. If I can just keep up this pace of getting new traffic to my blog I’ll be the most fucking famous person ever in like…two years. Maybe then I’ll have a chance to throw all of you in the looney bin. Unless of course you agree with everything I say in which case you can be part of my presidential cabinet, as long as you know who your fucking daddy is.
P.P.S. Uh… scary reasoner, if you’re reading this…I know this will sound kinda’ funny since we were like fighting and all that shit, but…could you blogroll me?
I don’t know I’m like fucking obsessed with getting people to read my shit, and I know your blog is an atheist blog and over here I call atheist moron, but first of all…deep down you know I’m really right. Second of all, even if you delude yourself into thinking that you’re right you should still blogroll me because that would say to all your readers, “hey, I’m a real atheist, I’m not afraid to debate, I’m not afraid of the competing ideas, and all that bullshit, my ideas can withstand any kind of scrutiny and all that shit.” I think it would be totally awesome, but then again, I’m the Lone Crusader, not the Scary Reasoner. I’m “Lone” so I don’t expect other people to see thing my way and that’s just the fucking life I was handed.
In any case. If you don’t blogroll me I think you’re a fucking fraud who only wants to “sing to the choir” and get your dick sucked by all of your atheist fans who also are morons like you. Okay. Ignore what I just said.
Just blogroll me okay? It will be cool.
You can even give me a title like: “Retarded Believer in “G-d” or something like that. I don’t mind. Just get me some more traffic dude!!!!! Please!!!
I’ve only got like 2 years to become the most fucking famous person in the world and right now all I’ve got is this freebie blog and like four atheist fuckers commenting on here. You’re a blogger. You can help me. Help me dude.
There’s such a lack of truth in the world that it makes me scream sometimes. Do you realize how the media can just convince you of bullshit and then it becomes “fact” for years to come?
Do you realize how this fucks up the world?
Well, here’s an example.
The media is always talking about the Israelis in conflict with the “Palestinians”. Now who the fuck are these “Palestinians”?
Did you know that the Jewish run newspaper now called the Jerusalem Post used to be called the “Palestinian Post”?
No? Well look it up fucker, it’s true.
Do you know that up until the 1960s EVERYONE in that area including the JEWS were called “Palestinians”?
How come all the sudden these Arabs living there who are mainly from Egypt got this special little title all to themselves.
Do you know how they got it? Because the media decided to give it to them to hide the truth from you.
The truth is that there are already 66 Arab states. The Jews on the other hand didn’t have any state pre-1948. They always wandered from country to country getting the shit beaten out of them by:
the Romans,
the Greeks,
the Babylonians,
the Turkish,
the Russians,
the Polish,
the Czechs,
the Spanish,
the Portuguese,
the Italians,
and the list goes on and on.
Now the Jews want to have ONE FUCKING TINY LITTLE STATE while the Arabs have 66 fucking massive states all around those 6 million Jews.
Well that one Jewish state was just one too many for the inexplicably sick and twisted folks in the media.
So this was the plan. The media said: Instead of framing the Arabs as the “Goliath” and the Jews as the “David”, let’s turn the table on those fucking Jews (that we hate for no good reason because we’re evil fuckers).
All we have to do is take these Egyptian Arabs who are living near the Jews and their one tiny state and give them a name.
We’ll call them “Palestinians” and then we’ll make up some bullshit about how the Jews are mistreating them (when in fact the only way those Arabs could still be there is with Israeli hand-outs and support that is much greater than what they give to their own citizens).
Then we’ll say that these Arabs need their own state, because they are “Palestinians”, they don’t belong in any other Arab state. They need their own state.
You fuckers.
That’s the Jews who have no state of their own! Those Arabs have 66 states they can go to. Jordan was actually supposed to be the state for them.
But no. Now the Jews who have been getting fucked over in every generation now need to give up land from their little tiny slice of land smaller than the size of New Jersey and give it to the Arabs who have already 66 states and in their media are claiming they want to cause another holocaust on the Jews.
Is that what you want? Another holocausts on the Jews? Why you evil fuckers? What the hell did the Jews do to you that you wish this upon them.
You fucking bastards.
There’s so little truth in this world it makes me want to scream.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
I feel better now. But not that much better.
Thank G-d there’s at least the Lone Crusader.
It’s me versus the rest of you sick evil brainwashed fuckers. Whoever wants to join me can. Or you can join the evil bastards who want the Jews thrown into the sea for no goddamn reason.
Fuck you assholes!
The Lone Crusader is here to tell you what you are, and what you are is scum.
The Lone Crusader.
